Funny – Would You Take the Deal? – page 35

You can only listen to music if it's played by a live kazoo band following you around?

Every time you eat a meal, you must do so while standing on one leg?

You must replace every "yes" with a loud crowing sound ("Cock-a-doodle-doo!") for the rest of your life?

Every time you walk through a doorway, you must skip through it?

Every time you laugh, you must immediately follow it with a loud, sustained rooster crow?

You can only travel by unicycle for the rest of your life?

You must publicly perform a 30-second interpretive dance every time you enter a new building?

You must always address strangers as 'Your Royal Highness'?

You have to sing everything you want to say to strangers?

Every photograph you take has a tiny, blurry ghost in the background?

Every time you leave your house, you trip over nothing (but never get hurt)?

Your car horn honks your current mood whenever you use it?

Every time you tell a lie, a small, harmless bell rings loudly?

Every time you take a photo, you must make a funny animal noise?

You must always carry a small, empty watering can everywhere you go?

Every time you sit down, you must dramatically sigh as if exhausted?

Every time you laugh, it must be a really loud, exaggerated cackle?

Every time you exit a room, you must stumble slightly as if you've tripped (without actually falling)?

You must narrate your every action aloud in the third person whenever you are alone?

You must start every new conversation by doing a 5-second silly dance?